I know, I know

It's been ages. Ages! I've settled down in a small suburb just outside of Sydney and have been feeling, well, settled. Crows Nest is a neighborhood mostly suited for young families and professionals, and though there is a nice little strip of restaurants and shops, there's not really very much to do here. Things close early, and even without any sort of 9-5 job holding me down during the days, I've found myself hitting the sack early, as if I need to be awake for an early morning meeting. I've picked up a job at a local cafe, and between that and going to shows and hanging with friends, I've been spending much of my spare time reading, watching movies, or going to the pool. I suppose it all sounds very lax and not so exciting, and for the most part I guess you'd be right. While I've realized I'm the type of person to bore easily when I don't have enough going on, I've recently come to realize that this shit is never going to be perfect. When I'm busy, I'm fucking crying about not having enough me time, but Lord, too much me time can get exhausting - no offense to myself. The grass will always be greener. It's a common dilemma, I know, and I've been thinking a lot about how to get past it. How to keep my mind and body active and hard at work, and actually enjoy it all the while. Is it possible? Can it be? On rare occasions, I come across a person who has been able to find passion, whether it be through work or art or love or music - and who are simply grateful for possessing it in the first place. I suppose that it is asking a lot. To want a life full of friends and fun, of artistic and intellectual accomplishments, and of course the time to simply sit back and enjoy it all. The search may last a long while, but in the meantime I'll do my best to appreciate the fact that I'm able to ponder such real, intense, life-altering questions while some are stuck sitting in front of a blue screen all day long.....